I know how tired you must feel now that you’re finally home with your little bundle of joy. The past few days have likely been anything but easy, but you made it through heroically—just as all moms do. It’s part of our mission in life: to be the best superheroes for our children.
Now that you’re home with your little one, you might feel the urge to put them in their own room—the one you’ve lovingly prepared since learning you were pregnant. It’s an exciting step, and it might feel like the right thing to do for your baby.
But before you make that decision, I’d like to share some advice, mom-to-mom, and also as a behavioral therapist. I feel it’s my responsibility to guide you as much as you’ll allow me to.
This might be an article you’ll want to revisit when you’re well-rested and energized because if you’re reading this while feeling drained, my perspective might not resonate with you right now.
I know how overwhelming this time can be. Sleep deprivation is no stranger to new moms. I know what it feels like to wonder when you last had a solid six hours of uninterrupted sleep. It’s exhausting and can make you feel like you’re losing your mind.
But here’s something I believe deeply: sleep training is for us, the parents. It’s not—and shouldn’t be—for our little ones.
Your baby needs all the love, hugs, kisses, and attention you can give—every single second they need it. They’re not asking for much; they’re asking for you.
Take a deep breath and remember that your baby knows only you. They’ve spent months hearing your heartbeat, feeling the rhythm of your body, and knowing the sound of your voice. These are their constants—their safe haven. Transitioning them to sleep alone, especially so early, might send a message you don’t intend: that when they need you most, they’re on their own.
Over time, this lesson could linger, shaping their view of the world in ways you never intended.
Early sleep training can leave a lasting impact and, for many, it’s experienced as trauma.
By keeping them close to you, you’re not spoiling them. You’re showing them they can trust you to be there. This trust becomes the foundation for their emotional security and resilience as they grow.
Over time, as your baby grows, they will naturally learn to sleep more independently—at their pace and in their own time.
This journey isn’t just about survival; it’s about building a deep, loving connection that will carry your child through life. Every sleepless night and every exhausted moment is an investment in their sense of security and their understanding that they are loved unconditionally.
One day, you’ll look back on these challenging early days and realize how fleeting they were. The nights might feel endless now, but they are laying the foundation for a bond that will last a lifetime. You are their anchor, their safe place, and their world.
Remember, the love and bond we build with our little ones now are the foundation of their future relationships in life. It shapes how they perceive the world and whether they approach it with confidence and security or hesitation and doubt. The safety and comfort you provide in the early years set the tone for their emotional well-being for years to come.
So, my advice to you, mamma, is to try and create a rhythm that works for both of you. This could mean safe room-sharing by placing their cot next to your bed so they know you’re there at all times. Respond to their cries with the love and attention they need. Help them navigate these new beginnings with confidence. They need that—and they need you for that.
So, give yourself grace. Rest when you can. Lean on those around you for support. And most importantly, trust that keeping your little bundle of joy close to you is one of the greatest gifts you can give them.
Give your baby you.